1 Kings 18:21 (NET)
This morning I read the Old Testament story of Elijah confronting the indecisive people of his day. One word stunned me. Paralyzed. Someone who is paralyzed goes nowhere. Someone who refuses to make a decision goes nowhere. I never thought my indecisiveness was too serious. I never thought about how it keeps me stuck.
What does it feel like to be stuck? I know what it’s like to get stuck in a snowdrift. I’ve driven into a snowdrift and stepped into a snowdrift. I could go nowhere. The more I moved the deeper my car or feet sunk into the snow. Until I called for and received help, I remained there. Cold. Lonely. Anxious.
I thought about what decisions I’ve been avoiding. One is the decision whether or not to renew my website for another year or not? Whether or not to keep writing and posting my blog? I thought about how this indecision has been affecting me. How is it keeping me stuck?
This is what I realized. Not making a decision is a decision. It’s a ‘No’ I’m not admitting to. Not writing and posting anything has been kept me stuck in a snow drift of negative thinking. Self-doubt. Anxiety. Do I want to get out of this drift? Yes. I do. With the help of God’s grace, I am doing so. I’m making a commitment to write and publish a post every Friday.
Maybe you would like to ask yourself these questions.
- What decisions am I avoiding?
- Why am I avoiding them?
- In what way(s) is this failure to me?
Love this, Jane ❤️
Thanks, Lisa
I am so glad you are committing to writing and publishing a post weekly. They are an inspiration and I have missed them.
Prayers for God’s guidance and energy as you resume this.
Thanks for your encouragement, Ruth. I deeply appreciate your support and prayers.
A very thoughtful reflection, Jane. I connected it to my indecision about visiting a friend in hospice. She needs her friends now, yet I’ve been waffling, not deciding. I did, finally, make a plan to go see her, and your post well describes the mental state I was in. Keep posting!
Thanks for reading and commenting on this post, Jean. I’m grateful my words were relevant to you, and appreciate your encouragement to continue posting.
Good for you Jane! Since I started my own substack I have learned so many things. I spend the week in my mind thinking thoughts that may turn into an informative or inspirational essay. It keeps my mind from aimlessly wandering. You go girl!
Thanks for your words of encouragement, Judith. I’m so glad you started your own substack. I love your posts. You inspire me and challenge me to think.